As a wise man once said: "A solid RB can still carry a team to a fantasy title". Kamara carried Levi to a fantasy title ALL BY HIMSELF
I'd like to start out by thanking --- everyone, I guess --- for NOT making the effort to point out just how mind-bogglingly wrong my last post was. Kamara had already done his SIX TD dances at the time that I wrote it, putting Jason in an epic hole.
I'm too lazy to look up the league history to figure out whether this was the most lopsided championship game ever. But I'm confident it's the only time in league history that A SINGLE PLAYER outscored an entire team in a championship game. Hell, it's probably the only time a player has single-handedly won a game at any point in the season. Congratulations to Levi for getting to enjoy this epic beatdown. And I would be remiss if I didn't post my favorite video once again for Jason's benefit (of course, it would have been more appropriate had I posted it on Christmas Day):
It will be hard to come with anything else useful to say after the Kamara/Leviathans title game, but let's see whether maybe I can anyway.
I guess no one should be surprised that Craptastics lost the title game. For one thing, Jason has held onto that crappy team name for 3 seasons now, so he kind of deserves to be crushed like a styrofoam cup under a circus elephant. Also, other than a 3-week aberration from weeks 5-7, the Craptastics didn't crack 80 points all season, scored the fourth-fewest points in the league, and backed into the playoffs on a 2-game losing streak.
It's not surprising that Jason lost; it's absolutely STUNNING that he made it as far as he did.
It's a LITTLE bit surprising that AirMatt fell so far, so fast. He put up the most points in the league, more than 100 more than the next-highest-scoring team (the champion Leviathans), and went into the playoffs with the top seed --- where he promptly dropped two games, including losing the consolation matchup in dramatic fashion. His 63 startable RBs (or whatever the number was) didn't show up for some reason, and instead was handily defeated by Adam and his backfield of (checks notes) --- Mike Davis and Myles Gaskin.
Okay, then.
As of this writing, there is still one game where the outcome is in doubt: the battle for next year's top pick. If Pete loses, it will be because he started Darren Waller over Jimmy Graham, and if Taylor loses, it's because he started Diontae Johnson and Antonio Brown over CeeDee Lamb and Nelson Agholor. Whee! Fantasy football is fun!
And if Aaron beats Kevin, it will be because Aaron decided, what the heck, let's start Aaron Rodgers at QB, while Kevin decided, what the heck, let's leave Derek Carr on the bench and put his backup in the lineup instead.
This was actually the shark move. Kevin has already figured out that the 4-slot is the place he wants to be in next year's draft!
It looks like I beat Merrill in the most pointless playoff game, the battle for the fifth overall pick. Whee. And to round out the league, Jody fired Harbaugh in more ways than one --- losing the Toilet Bowl to Kubicek, thus guaranteeing that his team will be called something else next year.
Unless Levi flakes and doesn't pick a name for Jody's team. Because it kind of feels like we don't do that any more.
In any case, congratulations to everyone for making it through the season which I predicted would never happen! Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! Blessed solstice! Happy Hannukah! Merry Kwanzaa! Yippee Festivus! And similar felicitations and greetings, no matter how you may choose to celebrate the end of one of the most miserable years of our lifetimes!
End of year accounting and whatnot will be available when I damn well feel like it.
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